Advantagdes of being a woman

For Dima

• We got off the Titanic first.
• Our boyfriend's clothes make us look elfin & gorgeous. Guys look like complete idiots in ours.
• We can be groupies. Male groupies are stalkers.
• Men die earlier, so we get to cash in on the life insurance.
• Free drinks, Free dinners, Free movies ... (you get the point).
• We can hug our friends without wondering if she thinks we're gay.
• We can hug our friends without wondering if WE'RE gay.
• New lipstick gives us a whole new lease on life.
• We don't have to fart to amuse ourselves.
• We can congratulate our team-mate without ever touching her butt.
• We never have to reach down every so often to make sure our privates are still there.
• If we're dumb, some people will find it cute.
• We have the ability to dress ourselves.
• We can talk to people of the opposite sex without having to picture them naked.
• Our friends won't think we're weird if we ask whether there's spinach in our teeth.
• There are times when chocolate really can solve all your problems.
• We'll never regret piercing our ears.
• We know which glass was ours by the lipstick mark.
• We have enough sense to realize that the easiest way to get out of being lost is to ask for directions