This is a post I stole from the Bookie Wookie blog who stole it from George Carlin who probably stole it from someone else, LOL.
Enjoy!
1. People who point at their wrist asking for the time... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
2. People who are willing to get off their a** to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.
3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn Right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?
4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?
5. When people say while watching a film, "did ya see that?" No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor!
6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"... Didn't give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
7. When something is 'new and improved'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.
8. When people say "life is short". What the hell??? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!!! What can you do that's longer?
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" If the bus came, would I be standing here???
Enjoy!
1. People who point at their wrist asking for the time... I know where my watch is pal, where the hell is yours? Do I point at my crotch when I ask where the toilet is?
2. People who are willing to get off their a** to search the entire room for the TV remote because they refuse to walk to the TV and change the channel manually.
3. When people say "Oh you just want to have your cake and eat it too". Damn Right! What good is cake if you can't eat it?
4. When people say "it's always the last place you look". Of course it is. Why the hell would you keep looking after you've found it? Do people do this? Who and where are they?
5. When people say while watching a film, "did ya see that?" No Loser, I paid $12 to come to the cinema and stare at the damn floor!
6. People who ask "Can I ask you a question?"... Didn't give me a choice there, did ya sunshine?
7. When something is 'new and improved'. Which is it? If it's new, then there has never been anything before it. If it's an improvement, then there must have been something before it, couldn't be new.
8. When people say "life is short". What the hell??? Life is the longest damn thing anyone ever does!!! What can you do that's longer?
9. When you are waiting for the bus and someone asks "Has the bus come yet?" If the bus came, would I be standing here???
15 comments:
Hi Lazy King!
I hate those things too! But, you all are going to the wrong movies. Go on the weekend, where before noon it's $6, and the kerasotes movie club in Chgo, after a few weeks, w/ a card, it's $5.00! I might go this weekend to finally see angels & demons! Have a GREAT WEEKEND!
haha, i think we're on the same page, buddy! i especially love #2! at the gym, we have mini lcd tvs in front of our cardio machines; all one has to do is extend their arm to turn the channel or adjust the volume, but no that's too hard. two inches away from the tv, clients will use the remote. unbelievable isn't it? i guess they want to conserve their energy before their training session. now, i can understand if the tv is on channel 9 and you want channel 75, use the remote, but from 9 to 17, please, stop being lazy!! ha ha!!
Lol. Even though he was way before my time, George Carlin was a freakin' genius.
:]
these piss me of too,when somebody asks me"Can I Ask you a question?" I usually say:"You just wasted your question."
the thing is that you cant have the cake and eat it too, because then you don't have the cake any more. And the thing is that you want to have it.
@Thuy, rotflmao. you are hilarious
@BlackSnow, I should have added that to the list
@Everyone, you guys cracked me up. Funny comments
very interesting and funny..lol :)
hahahha.....great post...!! I'm still laughing..!! Loved it..!!!
LOL! I think that's why someone came up with the "Here's your sign..." quote.
#5 is the winner. I hate explaining a movie to my kids while it is rolling. Then, I miss something important. THEY ARE RIGHT THERE WATCHING IT TOO!! Pay attention
I haven't seen this one in a long time, but it still makes me laugh. My current pet peeve is when people talk loudly on their cell phones and the gist of the conversation is "nothing, what are you doing?" You both have nothing to say, just hang up and spare us having to listen to you.
how oh how do I let you know how much i am laughing!!!!!!very very good.Pity you don't have the "e mail this" option
I point at my wide-open mouth when i ask people "Do you want to eat?"
And yes. i can do that. genius, yeah? LOL
GREAT, but the craziest questions is: "Are you awake"?
Haha this is a funny collection, I make my own lists about things I hate in people and criticize well basically everything!
This is a good place to start>>>
http://www.little-stain.com/2011/03/people-i-could-do-without-part-ii.html
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