F*** My Life

Here are few bizarre experiences submitted daily by readers in the FML website. It's hilarious and others readers can give their opinions about them.

Today, I was trying on lingerie in the dressing room of Victoria’s Secret with my boyfriend next to me. I told my him in a seductive, playful tone “You can stay and watch if you give me a piece of your gum.” He said “No I only have three more” and left the room.

Today, I started a fight at a lesbian bar and lost. I'm a man.

Today, I went on a coffee date with a guy I'm interested in. He picked up his phone mid-date to finalize dinner plans with another girl.

Today, I was instructed by my boss to welcome the 2 new foreign business partners since I am the only one who could speak their language. When they arrived I greeted them in their language. One of them scratched his head and asked his companion in plain and clear English, "What did he say?"

Today, I stood by the wall at a party while everyone else danced and ignored me. It was my birthday party.

Today, I looked on my sister's phone. There was a text from her boyfriend: "Let's go camping again, I bought more condoms so we won't make a big mess this time." Last time they went camping, they borrowed my sleeping bag.

Today, I took my friend to buy a pregancy test. She took it and it came out negative. I decided to re-pee on it to be funny...it turned to positive.

For more click here.