"I'm going to the backseat of my car with the woman I love, and I won't be back for TEN MINUTES."

"Dear Lord: The gods have been good to me. For the first time in my life, everything is absolutely perfect just the way it is. So here's the deal:
You freeze everything the way it is, and I won't ask for anything more. If that is OK, please give me absolutely no sign. OK, deal. In gratitude, I present you this offering of cookies and milk. If you want me to eat them for you, give me no sign. Thy will be done

"Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, you'd step over your own mother just to get one! But you can't stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!

"D'oh!!!"

"You tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is 'never try'."

"I am so smart, I am so smart, s-m-r-t....I mean s-m-A-r-t."

"Ha ha! Look at this country! ? U R Gay!? Ha ha!" (looking at Uruguay on the globe).

"What's the point of going out, we're just going to end up back here anyway?"

Alcohol: the cause of and solution to all of life's problems

"but marge it's uterUS not uterYOU"

1 comments:

Anonymous said...

hahaha I like it

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